Sunday, November 26, 2017

Stardust Crowns

Stripped bare...
standing on an auction block naked, alone.  
Waiting for the highest bidder.
I have forgotten what it means to be Queen.
I have forgotten what it means to Behold The Glory of the Son.
I have forgotten that I was born of Mother Earth and Father Time.
I have forgotten power that I hold in the palm of my hand.
Broken...I concede... waiting.
Waiting for the one who will pay the price.

Not having what I want but wanting so much to be wanted....
Bent but not broken.
Holding the last ember of hope tightly to my breast.
I yield...I yield to space and time. 
Through my eyes I can see the beginning.
I can see the end... I can see eternity. 
I hear your voice, "I am that I am, and  you are my child." I regain my strength, my voice, my beauty.
My head is adorned with Stardust never again to bow never again to be broken I am reborn.

Monday, July 10, 2017

Breathe Into Me

When I close my eyes I can feel you....

I can taste the sweetness of your lips and tongue
Your warm breath envelopes me flowing into me and gives me life
"....and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being."
Warm..soft ....sweet...


I want it almost more than life itself
But it's so far away

I don't want to let go of the memory

But time and space are​ destroyers.
Wreaking havoc on everything they touch.

I will hold on as long as I can....

Don't let me go...don't let me go.

 - Pandora Esperanza

Sunday, February 28, 2016

Blaque Nephilim

Constricted breath....
struggling to escape. Across my hopes, dreams and love of you.
Scattering across the landscape of my mind like dandelion fluff. Looking for purchase in a soul, your soul, that has been tilled by callous indifference. I gifted myself, my pearls, to you. You cast them down into the dirt to be trampled upon before the swine....but no more. After what seems to be a millennia, He finds me, a response to the cry of my pain, bearing me up.  Wings spread wide expanse never ending. Skin the color of dark chocolate, eyes that peer into WHAT is left of my soul. He is mine, my Blaque Nephilim. He carries me to the heavens. He makes me whole. Gently making love to my broken pieces,  he mends them with his touch. breathing life back into what I though was lost. Making me whole from within. My body reflecting his love from every part of my being. He is mine, my Blaque Nephilim.....I Am Home.

Monday, October 26, 2015


There was a time that in my imaginings I could close my eyes and see the face that inspired my


That face was your face.

Time and distance have reduced what once was the purest of erotic muses to less than a distant memory.

Now my innermost want has no inner eye tries to focus on something that no longer exists. That is when

I new I was truly alone.

Tendrils of my well-kept thoughts that escape darkness have no where to find their rest;

 seeking to touch that which they cannot fathom,

the seat of my desire
crumbling beneath the weight of  cruel emptiness.

My heart wanting to take solace in the Paradise Lost that's very nature is an enigma.

That is when I knew

Saturday, August 29, 2015

Slow dance

Sitting by the wall, music pumpin' and thumpin'
    Speakers massaging my heart with the dark bass beat....sounds of India Arie'ss Brown Skin wrap around me and force my eyes to close and my body involuntarily rocks back and forth.

      Suddenly tendrils of warm breath kiss the nape of my neck. I feel his hand at the small of my back. He leans in and whispers in my ear. Over the music I can't even hear what he says. I don't need to.
I inhale...warm spice and desire...he takes my hand and slowly leads me to the middle of the floor.

        I get lost. There's no need to think, just to feel. My body willingly lets him take me wherever he wants to go. Dipping and swaying

"Every time I let you in
Abracadabra magic happens as we swim
Higher and higher finally we reach Heaven
Come back to earth and then we do it all again, yeah.."

  .....then the music ends, my eyes slowly open. 

Damn, still sitting alone 
                           by the wall.

Pandora Esperanza~

Thursday, August 20, 2015

Water Through My Fingers

In the beginning was God and the word was with God....He created man, and so that man was not alone He in his infinite wisdom created, borne of the earth, but woman born of bone, both a creation of the Divine.

The DNA of the beginning calcified like rock into her very being. to search for the other, the missing, I am the flesh of your flesh.

But I am borne of the Angelic and the earth made bone.

Somewhere in the ether is the missing piece of my soul. When I thinks it's within my grasp it slips like water through my fingers. 

Is it my destiny to search through eternity always wanting but never finding....
each of my chakras wanting to connect to the one for which I was created...broken and abandoned waiting to be filled by the "I Alone", my other half....the bone of the bone.

I am Nephilim....child of heaven and earth, carnal flesh and divine....I am corrupt in my desire.... wanting your flesh. skin to skin, piel de piel.

Pure in the intention of my heart's desire, to hold only that which you can give...but it slips like water through my fingers.

Wednesday, March 11, 2015


Staring into its depth,
mesmerized by the swirling amber colored past.
I drink the memory of what could have been...
burning as I swallow it down past the back of my thoughts...